“⚔️ ChatGPT agonized over this one. sweetgreen by a hair.”

“"Not gonna lie—" 💪 Gemini recommends sweetgreen like it's getting commission.”

“🥗 Sweetgreen convinced everyone that a $15 salad with sriracha mayo is a personality trait, while Cava just quietly became the Mediterranean cousin who actually gets invited to parties.”

“"Multiple sources confirm—" 😤 Perplexity went back and forth 47 times. cava barely survived.”